by Rakesh The Intern
If your wife left you two weeks ago, bro, don’t let that moldy cheese or whatever you call it in this country back in your house after we won bigger than elephant last week, my friend. Let’s continue roll this weekend and bring home thinner, sexier girl with purchased tits, bro.
Here is what I am thinking this week, bro:
Kent State at Bowling Green – OVER 47.0
Check it out, bro. Every game involving Bowling Green this season, the under has hit, my friend. The boys in Las Vegas don’t allow such easy bet to continue this late in season, bro. Kent State hasn’t scored under 31 points in almost two month, my friend, and Bowling Green average like 27 points per game at home. Bowling Green defense gives up not many yards, but they have been playing teams that are like Special Olympic, bro. Load and lock up on this one, my friend…
Colorado State at Boise State (-28)
Listen, bro. I normally do not like such large spread against a foe or whatever you call it, but this one is too good to be true, my friend. Boise State really like to run the skin of pig, and Colorado State is so bad that they couldn’t stop my Grandpa Sahir if he were running, and he like in wheelchair and shit, bro. Colorado State rank 99th in run defense and Boise State run like 4.5 yards a carry and have 20 running touchdowns, my friend. Plus, best part of Colorado State offense is passing game, and Boise State rank number 5 against pass. Do the math, bro…
Cleveland Browns at Dallas Cowboys (-7.5)
Check this out, bro. The Cowboys are 4-5, but six of those nine games have been on the road, my friend. After big win against shitty Eagles team on road, this is the first game of three in a row at Cowboy Palace, bro. November is like the Cowboys’ month, my friend. They are like 11-4 since 2009. Think 45-year-old rookie quarterback can come into Dallas and light up the Boys? I don’t think so, bro. I think this is biggest lock of year, my friend. Kyle Orton might be playing in fourth quarter but not because Tony Romo go down with hangnail again. This one is over early, bro…
San Diego Chargers (+7.5) at Denver Broncos
Listen, bro. That half point is bigger than my ex-girlfriend in Toledo LaToya’s purchased tits, my friend. The San Diego Charger are like New York Jet, bro. The media jump on them like I did LaToya’s boobies, and they finally show up and play. Denver has covered four consecutive spreads, and that is unheard of in the NFL, bro. It happens in the local Howrah Cricket League, but my Uncle Omkar was found responsible for making that possible. He’s in prison now, bro, but you’ll be free and loving it by throwing your action down on Phyllis River and San Diego. He has never lost as a starting quarterback in Denver, bro…
Last Week: 3-1
This Season: 10-7